An absolute poppet A story about Paul Dacre, editor of The Daily Mail

Amazon – the Artful Predator

Prince Andrew and the Diamond Necklace Affair

Autumn – the season of slipping up The pavements of the metropolis become dangerous in the autumn


The BAFTA awards and the tedium of ‘diversity’

Mary Beard – a polemical review A review of Meet the Romans, a mini-series presented by the awful Mary Beard

Black, white, and the BBC – what price the truth? Pissed-off Toff reviews a ‘colour-blind’ doc-drama broadcast by the BBC

Brexit no. 1 … circa 410 AD

Brexit – a killer of friendships

Kathy Burke should be burned at the stake

Busy One of Pissed-off Toff’s least favourite words is ‘busy’


Catch me if you can The dangers posed to pedestrians by feral cyclists

China: a virus, a scam, and an act of lunacy … in which, among other things, Pissed-off Toff explains the workings of a clever Chinese scam

Jeremy Corbyn the next PM? Take your money and run

Customer service, Sainsbury’s style


Diary 1, late July 2019

Diary 2, mid-August 2019

Diary 3: Could the monarchy survive inside the EU?

‘Diversity’? So where are the white people?

Drinkers like me


An encounter with the spirit world … in the shape of floating pale orbs

The Enigma of Kidson A review of the biography of the renowned Eton schoolmaster

Et in Arcadia ego A review of Simon Reeve’s awful TV documentary about Greece

Eton reunion – is one a failure? Ahead of the next grand Old Boys dinner at Eton, Pissed-off Toff ruminates

Extinction Rebellion – the madness is only relative


Fluke scoop – the origin of the Coronavirus


Glastonbury … or Nuremberg? Pissed-off Toff bemoans the virtue-signalling conformity and group-think of the Glastonbury Festival

The Great Fire of London – steer well clear A dismal historical documentary reviewed


Hail Boris! But not necessarily Stanley … Pissed-off Toff feels that a little bit of Johnson père goes a long way

‘Hamilton’ and ‘The Apprentice’ A review of two popular shows

How can The Spectator get Eton so wrong?

Hysteria and hyperbole – the hallmarks of the modern world Terrified by a never-ending succession of baseless scare stories, the modern world has taken leave of its senses


‘Islamophobia’ – a crime in the making?


Just ‘cos someone asks a question … Pissed-off Toff hates Jeremy Hunt



Language – like – evolves? The use of the now-universal filler-word ‘like’

Lockdown Diary (1) – the first day of a new Police state

Lockdown Diary (2) – 25-29 March

Lockdown Diary (3) – 31 March to 1 April

Lockdown Diary (4) – 2-5 April

Lockdown Diary (5) – 6-9 April

Lockdown Diary (6) – 10-15 April

Lockdown Diary (7) – 16-18 April

Lockdown Diary (8) – 19-21 April

Lockdown Diary (9) – 22-26 April

Lockdown Diary (10) – 27 April to 3 May

Lockdown Diary (11) – 4-10 May

Lockdown Diary (12) – 11-17 May

Lockdown Diary (13) – 18-25 May – the lockdown breaks down

Lockdown Diary (14) – 26 May to 3 June – final bumper edition

The lockdown is a crime

London abandoned, in photographs (1)

London abandoned, in photographs (2)

Loser In which Pissed-off Toff considers another of his least favourite words


“Madder than ever!!” A snobbish story

‘Man-made climate change’ – the biggest delusion of all?

‘Man-made climate change?’ It’s the religious instinct gone mad.

Migration? Or invasion??

Mobiles 1 A short story about smartfone addiction

My very own Boris story … and a moral A true Boris story, told for the first time


Never apologise … especially to peasants

A new flag for the EU

Noise 1 A brief overview of the various noises that afflict the inhabitants of London

Noise 2 What is it about some noises that make them unbearable?

Noise 3 An altercation about electronic noise on a train turns nasty

Noise 4 Music in bars and restaurants

Noise 5: A better life for all … at zero cost

Now who does he remind me of? Ah yes! It’s Boris!! In which we note the startling similarity between Boris Johnson and Robert Morley


Oligarchs are good for you!


Parasite: a review

Prelude XXI by Bach … aka the Bugger-bugger prelude Pissed-off Toff plays one of his favourite Bach preludes

A prelude, by Bach, to the impending ruination Before we allow the Coronavirus to ruin us, Pissed-off Toff plays the organ in York Minster


Quiz – a tenner for the right answer

Quiz – the answer


Reciprocity – the rules of entertaining

The Riot Club A review of the film of that name

Rory – more Taliban than Tory? Pissed-off Toff takes a look at Rory Stewart


A Silly email? Off to jail! The hazards of firing off ill-considered emails

William Sinclair – a picaresque life reviewed

A Solution to homelessness? The Black Death

Southern Railway – market leaders … of a sort


This green advert makes me see red There’s no getting away from ‘diversity’ and the ‘man-made-global-warming’ myth

The Transgender debate – welcome to dystopia

Two royal documentaries … and two unintended consequences Pissed-off Toff reviews two TV documentaries – one about Harry & Megan; the other about Prince Andrew



The Vegans have landed


Who wants to be human?

Why does one drink?